We really love the gory details, don't we? As long as someone's enough of an exhibitionist to post their vital stats for all to see, we're voyeuristic enough to dig right in! We find a person's home page, and can't wait to find the page with the picture. If the person's female, we hope for a real net.babe; if it's a male, we just know we're gonna find some freak with a spare chromosome and no social life. Judge for yourself how correct your assumption is.

the Bernard Pivot Questionnaire:
(the annoying thing that James Lipton does at the end of every episode of Inside the Actors Studio on Bravo)

Note: These answers are subject to change.

What is your favorite word? (Changes all too often)
What is your least favorite word? Whatever.
What turns you on? Wit that exceeds my own (which isn't all that hard).
What turns you off? People with opinions so strong that they can't conceive of the idea of the possibility of the slightest chance that they might be wrong nor can they just agree to differ. And, if you can't articulate or state a rationale for your opinion, you don't deserve to have one (but, that's just my opinion).
What sound do you love? A good trumpet solo.
What sound do you hate? Out of tune music.
What is your favorite curse word? It depends on the situation.
What profession other than yours would you like to attempt? Professional jazz trumpeter.
What profession would you not like to participate in? Trial lawyer.
If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? See? Wasn't it all worth it?

other gory details:

Due to a recurring bout with age, the image of me has been temporarily replaced with this similar likeness. I apologize for any inconvenience this may cause.

Name: If you're here, you've seen it already...
Sex: M
(sometimes T or even W)
Other Relevant Physical Characteristics:
Male, asian, 5'6", 8½ EEE.
Birthdate: July 3, MCMLXXIII
(If Mom had only waited 8 hours more...)

If this isn't enough, there's a guestbook and an email address on the front page.

This way to the egress...